Thursday, March 10, 2005
Faith??
I am having one of those defining moments in my life. Do I have faith, do I REALLY have faith. If you follow current events including the money markets you are aware that rates are rising, including mortgage rates. Business is SLOW! Times will be a little tough over the next couple of years. God has always provided in more and better ways than I could ever anticipate, so what is the problem? I wrestled with this last night. On the one hand I do believe that God takes care of me and my family, but I also believe that He expects me to use the gifts He has given me, including my intellect and resources to provide for my family. (yes, guys my husband does provide, but we are and always have been a TEAM!) So can I let go and have faith that God will provide, or is this one of those times that I am to “wise as a serpent”? I often state that I don’t worry. The truth is I don’t worry about what I know I can’t change, but I sometimes obsess about things that I have the illusion of “control” over. If I can control things, by george, I plan to control them! So am I in conflict with my faith when I try to control my destiny? What do you think?
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I've been having some of those same questions and doubts. Mainly because I really know that God has gifted me in so many ways, including being business-minded, but I believe that the cry of my heart is to be a stay-at-home wife and mom. Yet, that desire/calling has not been fulfilled for me yet. So, do I continue to have faith that God will provide that? Do I trust that His plan is far better and greater than any plan that I can create? No answers, just questions. But I hear you.
Really, I think we control a lot less than what we preceive we do. Somehow if we trust by faith each day, I think God will show us answers. It just gets so scary sometimes. When you get this one figured out, please let me know. JB
LOL--well, I do know that in my life, any time I have felt like I was in control, God showed me just how much control I really had (or lack thereof). I had always wanted (and pictured myself) as a stay at home mom--then John lost his job, and I got one. But you know what? I found out that 1) you can live on much less than you think you can and 2) I am capable of being more than a stay at home mom. I don't know, I find that looking back on situations like this, God is/was teaching me something. And I learn a new faith lesson every time . . .
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