Joyful Transformation

Terri’s post about one with from her Fairy God-mother got me to thinking. If I could change one thing about myself what would it be? I don’t think I would opt for any of the physical changes. At this point in my life I am truly realizing how unimportant physical appearance is. If I altered anything there it would be the growing of hair in new and old places. Somehow it seems that the older you get the more you become involved in hair removal….it ain’t right. But, I would not waste my wish on that. I could go with Terri on the sweeter “precious” mouth, but I can usually keep my mouth shut with enough effort and I don’t know that a radical personality change would be my first choice. (Besides, cutting sarcasm is just so much fun!)

There are many other things that I should probably want to change about myself. Just this morning my boss called me a man. He says I think more like a man because I am not emotional, I like sports, I don’t like to shop and I am not overly compassionate. (I am not sure all of that is a compliment, but I don’t deny it either). But the one thing that I would truly like to change is my concept of time. You see, I am the great procrastinator. Not just because I put things off to not do them, but I work better under pressure. If I am supposed to be somewhere in 15 minutes but it only takes 5 to get there, I will start another project just to kill the 10 minutes. Of course this project will usually take 12 minutes and therefore I am now running 2 minutes late. Why can’t I just leave and arrive a little early? In the same vein, I will wait until Tuesday night to study for my class on Wednesday night. I pack the night before I leave on vacation (if not the morning of), I shop for birthdays, Christmas, etc. at the very last minute. (Well I do a little better at Christmas; I usually start around December 15th). Just yesterday I had some papers to pick up for a 4:00 closing. I left the office at 3:15 and decided I could make 4 stops to be the most efficient on my time out of the office. I made it back here by 10 till, but really, wasn’t I pushing it just a little? Of course I was, this is how I live my life. Perhaps this more than any other thing adds to my stress levels.

So if I could have a wish granted it would be to change my concept/perception of time. I know you are thinking, “Well, you have identified the problem, now do something about it”. Do you think I haven’t known for a long time what the problem is? But I am going to try. I hate to wait, so I should be considerate and keep others from waiting on me. Like Terri said God isn’t through with me yet. We are going to be working on this. I don’t anticipate changing over night, but if I can change a little bit each day perhaps before long people will even start calling me organized and prepared!! (A girl can dream, right!)