Monday, January 23, 2006
Drifting
David is still not home. He is back in the Country; he called me from Detroit last night. He has been in the same clothes with no shower for four days. He is separated from his luggage and has not eaten a good meal since Friday. He should arrive home today and I might add just in the knick of time. …. The internet has been down at home since Tuesday. Shelby has brought the dead possum back (she is such a giver) and I am getting real used to sleeping in the middle of the bed….when I finally get in bed. I have also started staying up late and watching tennis every night. Truly I know that he is exhausted and I will be glad for him to be back at home.
When you are dissatisfied with something in your life does it take over your thinking? I know that there have been many times in life when I was unhappy with my weight or my job but I was always able to forget about it. But once I decided I was going to change things, I became consumed with thoughts of how to change. Once the decision is made and the plan is in place my brain will relax and go back on auto-pilot. The problem currently is I am in that “I know I need to change” mode. But I don’t have a plan. I am not even sure what I am looking for. But I know me. I will not be satisfied until I have worked through this. I can try to forget about it, but it will be like a pebble in my shoe, it will just continue to annoy me until I make a decision and act on it.
I also find that when I am in this drifting mode I don’t have much to say. Sorry, perhaps you could pray that I will find peace soon.
When you are dissatisfied with something in your life does it take over your thinking? I know that there have been many times in life when I was unhappy with my weight or my job but I was always able to forget about it. But once I decided I was going to change things, I became consumed with thoughts of how to change. Once the decision is made and the plan is in place my brain will relax and go back on auto-pilot. The problem currently is I am in that “I know I need to change” mode. But I don’t have a plan. I am not even sure what I am looking for. But I know me. I will not be satisfied until I have worked through this. I can try to forget about it, but it will be like a pebble in my shoe, it will just continue to annoy me until I make a decision and act on it.
I also find that when I am in this drifting mode I don’t have much to say. Sorry, perhaps you could pray that I will find peace soon.
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I'll pray for peace. I tend to get obsessive about things. If I'm thinking or worrying about something, then I'm thinking or worrying about it non-stop! I read in 1 of my studies that God is the only thing we can binge on guilt-free. I'm not sure about that. Can you ever have too much? ALL things in moderation, except God? OK - now I just gave myself another complex!!! ;-)
Ahhh Terri, if it were just as easy as changing hair color.
I am afraid this goes much deeper and believe it or not has nothing to do with how I look.
I am afraid this goes much deeper and believe it or not has nothing to do with how I look.
You know it's not like I want to change things it's that I want to be busy doing the things I need to be doing. Getting out of my own way and let the Spirit takeover. I was pretty focused on myself for a couple of years and lost focused on the things I needed to be taking care of (aka, boys). then you wonder if you are being cheated out of things. I guess all in all I feel blessed just to watch those around me get there glimpses of what God intends for them.
Normally I would say that I am able to move on and live in the moment. But right now I really know how you feel, only I'm not sure that I want to change because there is some comfort in that dissatisfaction. Does that make any sense? Mine is a little different in that I had set my mind and heart on one thing and now I don't want to let go of that, even though the door seems to have been closed.
In the past, it's helped me to just allow myself to be in that state and pray for wisdom and peace. God is faithful and He will give you peace and guide you.
Sure is easier to tell you what has helped me in the past than it is to put it into practice right now in my life.
I will be praying for you for God's wisdom, peace and guidance.
In the past, it's helped me to just allow myself to be in that state and pray for wisdom and peace. God is faithful and He will give you peace and guide you.
Sure is easier to tell you what has helped me in the past than it is to put it into practice right now in my life.
I will be praying for you for God's wisdom, peace and guidance.
Glad to hear David is in the USA. Tough trip!
Physical, spiritual, mental, emotional, financial, etc. List some categories and I imagine some thoughts will come to you.
Physical, spiritual, mental, emotional, financial, etc. List some categories and I imagine some thoughts will come to you.
Hope David is at your home by now!
I pray God will grant you the peace you are searching for very soon!
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I pray God will grant you the peace you are searching for very soon!
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